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July 30 2019

1315 4122 500
• Do not talk to a wall
• Do not throw your money away
• Do not consume Popmie (instant noodles) with Baygon (an insecticide)

Source: @Suketchiihara

May 22 2015

Horoscopes as Bikini Bottom recurring background characters



Aries: Nat Peterson

Taurus: Harold Bill Reginald

Gemini: Fred

Cancer: Sandals

Leo: Tom

Virgo: Nancy Suzy Fish

Libra: Sadie Rechid

Scorpio: Shubie

Saggitarius: Scooter

Capricorn: Dave

Aquarius: Old Man Jenkins

Pisces: Abigail Marge


Reposted byfancy-tangerinemolotovcupcake

May 04 2015

The Signs And What They Are Most Often Doing

Aquarius: Beating up Gemini
Pisces: Beating up Gemini
Aries: Beating up Gemini
Taurus: Beating up Gemini
Gemini: Bleeding and crying violently
Cancer: Beating up Gemini
Leo: Beating up Gemini
Virgo: Beating up Gemini
Libra: Beating up Gemini
Scorpio: Beating up Gemini
Sagittarius: Beating up Gemini
Capricorn: Beating up Gemini


Me as a judge

Me: what's they sign
Lawyer: your honor what do you mean?
Me: 😒 wus dey sign hoe
Lawyer: ummm....libra your honor
Me: guilty
Jury: tru


The band your sign misses the most

Aries: my chemical romance
Taurus: my chemical romance
Gemini: my chemical romance
Cancer: my chemical romance
Leo: my chemical romance
Virgo: my chemical romance
Libra: my chemical romance
Scorpio: my chemical romance
Sagittarius: my chemical romance
Capricorn: my chemical romance
Aquarius: my chemical romance
Pisces: my chemical romance

pkmn types of the zodiacs



LEO: ♌ 


April 30 2015

which celestial body should you fight


aries: none. stay home. 

taurus: the moon.

gemini: also the moon.

cancer: anything you goddamn want to.

leo: the sun.

virgo: the International Space Station.

libra: mars. good fucking luck. 

scorpio: the sun, but you’ll probably lose.

sagittarius: a mylar balloon in the shape of a star.

capricorn: start kicking rocks. you’re bound to find a meteor some day, and when you do you’re gonna tear it a new asshole. 

aquarius: the moon but only after tauros and gemini have softened it up a bit.

pisces: just go outside at night and scream. 

Reposted byredbeggarman redbeggarman

April 29 2015


The signs as Julian Casablancas tweets

Aries: "whenever I hear 'never say never' all i can think is 'but u just said it twice?'"
Taurus: "fuck zoos"
Gemini: "just ranting from my high twyttor horse"
Cancer: "why do drug addicts sometimes have such great style?"
Leo: "I'm always embarrassed that I like everything at urban outfitter"
Virgo: "warning: red bull is cocaine"
Libra: "the world must officially stop using the word 'literally'"
Scorpio: "It's all just happenstance people. Na'mean? Lol xoxo :) :( ;(-)- - - (vomiting winky-face)"
Sagittarius: "who likes clowns?? children in the 1800s maybe??"
Capricorn: "to all my friends, no more drunk faxing, this is the year i grow up..."
Aquarius: "a firm handjob is worth a thousand tweets"
Pisces: "how hot is that vodka robot?"

(via dreaminggq)

April 28 2015

Emojis for the signs:


Aries: ♈🐏😠💪👟🎽🏃📣🚘🍺🔥🏪

Taurus: ♉🐮😋🍫💝💻👞👢🍷🍝🌋🌱

Gemini: ♊👬😉👉👄👙📱🍹📖🎢🎭🃏

Cancer: ♋🐚😢👰👪💌📺🍼🌚💦♻💐

Leo: ♌🐻😎💛👏👑🌞🎬🎤🍻🌻🏆

Virgo: ♍👱😷🏥🌾🍞🎒📏🎓🍒🛀📊

Libra: ♎🗽😘💄👔👠🗼🌹🍸👓📚✒

Scorpio: ♏🌊😑🔎💀💋🔗❤👖👕🔫🔒

Sagittarius: ♐🏇😆👍💸🎉💃👣⛺🎲🎰🎯

Capricorn: ♑🐐😐💰💼⌚💲🍵🍴📰🌷💒

Aquarius: ♒⛲😤💨🔬📑📘💡👽✌🌿🌐

Pisces: ♓🐟😇🙏⛪🔯✴⌛🎡🎨🎶📀

March 24 2015

the signs: punk rock vs pop punk


Punk Rock: Aries, Taurus, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn, Aquarius 

Pop Punk: Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Libra, Sagittarius, Pisces

*raeps this post worships this post* PUNK ROCK ALL THE WAY

though this might not be true with my friends’ signs and their music preferences

March 23 2015

my opinion on the signs based off personal experience


aries: a lil mean, but only bc they’re not going to pretend they like you at all. they like to have fun, may party occasionally or a lot but even then they like to chill out and read. even if it may seem like they don’t, they love people close to them deeply. wings their eyeliner perfectly 

taurus: lazy food lovers with big hearts. closed-off emotionally unless you’re their close friend, but even then they won’t tell you 100% what’s wrong. they have great smiles and make you feel comfortable around them. they eat a lot of pasta.

gemini: so beautiful naturally. talkative (well, for most, def not all), is the person who you’ve never talked to but you just get this vibe from them that they’re great people and friends that makes you want to talk to them. very funny and cute, knows how to dress well. their voices sound like angels. i luv them

cancer: may be shy, but honestly i have never met a shy cancer. big cuddly babies and will make sure you know they like you everyday if they do. as friends, they’re perfect. they’ll make you laugh so hard and even though they may not be the coolest kid in school, the people who know them believe they are. good lovers and friends.

leo: they are the shit and know it. usually strikingly confident and good-looking. prideful. the most popular kids in school are usually leos. they are down to earth and sweet, but do not get on their bad side they will drop you like it was nothing. will make you laugh endlessly. they’re one of those people who you just met, but make you feel like close friends. easily approachable people.

virgo: weird. just weird as hell, which is why they’re often misunderstood. they’re extremely loyal to their friends, family and lovers. they aren’t judgemental at all, they just come off that way bc they’re shy/antisocial and are usually just observing you and everything you do (in a non-creepy way). positive people, appreciates art if they’re not an artist themselves. 

libra: to me, they’re like gemini. very very friendly and nice people, it can be hard for them to be mean. they tend to be a bit gossipy but don’t gossip about anything too bad or mean. if they love you, they’ll write you letters or draw you pictures. down to earth and sympathizes easily. likes expensive clothing although they may not have much money at all.

scorpio: sexy af. have very pretty, intense eyes and good hair. mysterious and hard to get, they will leave you on the edge of your seat. despite this, they are shy and may come off as innocent, and they can be. once they fall in love, they fall deeply and intensely, bc they’re just very deep and intense people. has the best music taste.

sagittarius: they are the life of the party. they’re adventurous and free-spirited and make the best artists. they’re basically the hippie of the signs. may come off as bitchy but actually likes you, or vice versa. great, loyal friends with big hearts and will come into your life and make it 10x more fun. positive people to be around, they def will make you happier.

capricorn: hard-working balls of joy. so laid back and just goes with the flow. extremely sweet people. may not be popular, actually they are often outcasts, but they definitely shouldn’t be bc they’re some of the greatest people you’ll meet. no one has ever made me laugh as hard as a capricorn has! they are a bit sensitive, so take their feelings into consideration. 

aquarius: even weirder than virgo, but that’s what makes them so fun. says random shit, knows how to make you laugh and are often very good-looking. may be a bit conceited, but that’s just bc they know how great they are. make the best writers. may be a bit clingy towards their friends and lovers, but they just have big hearts and hate it when people leave them.

pisces: my fav sign. they’re always so full of life and up for anything. they make any boring situation fun and are always there for you when you need them. they can be a bit pessimistic, so don’t take it to heart if it’s hard for you to cheer them up bc sometimes they just need alone time. huge hearted lovable people with the biggest and brightest smiles.

NOTE: this is coming from a virgo’s experience! you may think differently of the signs. 

As a Taurus I'd say that description is mostly true for me, and I do love some pasta.
Also from personal experience, I’ve got a talkative Gemini coworker (and some less talkative Gemini friends) and both my Cancer sisters started out shy. I dont know why when it comes to envy and copying, most of my envied/copied victims happen to be Libra, and sometimes my copycat allies are mostly Aquarius. I do enjoy the company of Aquarians and Sagittarians cuz I can be weird with them.

February 20 2015

the signs' favorite hobby


aries: masturbating using ram horns
taurus: bull riding
gemini: sex
cancer: eating crustacean 
leo: lion taming
virgo: picking flowers
libra: lawyering
scorpio: eating scorpions in shady vending areas 
sagittarius: archery
capricorn: herding goats
aquarius: pouring water or some shit
pisces: swimming

How the signs drink the milk they milked from their cows.


The well awaited sequel. cool astrology​ as a celebration for the original cow milking post getting 500 notes.

Aries: Tries to drink the milk with their eyebrows but fail once again and yell YOU WANNA FUCKING GO

Taurus: Drink gallons of milk with their cat

Gemini: "happy drinking"

Cancer: Doesn’t get any milk because they didn’t milk their damn cow

Leo: Claims that their milk is better quality because it came from a quality cow

Virgo: Drinks it just because they don’t want to offend the cow

Libra: Sits back and makes a profit by selling all the milk they got from the cow milking machines

Scorpio: Chugs it down so fast and so aggressively and so full of rage that half of it is just on their face, dripping

Sagittarius: Drink it and think to themselves, what a wonderful world

Capricorn: They would only drink it with their tea

Aquarius: Would drink it, but only if they are getting paid to

Pisces: Throws a milking party with the milk and everyone is invited 

February 15 2015

The signs and what god they would be


Aries - Kanye West

Taurus - Kanye West

Gemini - Kanye West

Cancer - Kanye West

Leo - Kanye West

Virgo - Kanye West

Libra - Kanye West

Scorpio - Kanye West

Sagittarius - Kanye West

Capricorn - Kanye West

Aquarius - Kanye West

Pisces - Kanye West

Reposted byTrollownia Trollownia

January 17 2015


January 13 2015


The Signs at a Party/Club


Aries- goes the hardest at dancing

Taurus- is the designated driver

Gemini- in the bathroom doing their makeup half the time

Cancer- drinks casually and probably leaves early

Leo- first one to do shots

Virgo- helps clean at the end

Libra- talks shit and is overdressed

Scorpio- either stays sober or passes out drunk

Sagittarius- first one on the dance floor

Capricorn- sticks to their friends and has a good time

Aquarius- breaks something accidentally

Pisces- makes sure their friends are okay but still does shots

October 18 2014

Signs - New restaurant staffed with deaf waiters




Watch it in video

This. This is how you break down ableist barriers. This is incredible for the deaf and for the custies. I would love to learn sign language, and I would learn it faster if it was standing between me and booze

this is so important

Reposted bymolotovcupcakegingergluesofeministhappykokeshiIhezalckisbackxmascolarazerocool911zboczonescierwobesenKurkaWyluzujrashfaelbrightbytewonkoohhwellSpinNE555boseylexxiedzonybeinthedrink-memawrrconsensualnonconsentablkuroMerarishitty-lovediebitchdiezupacebulowakoniBedikogetstonedlatheamadamebutterflynattalyizik21cellevangelynlolufomsbqannebananneFlypnmalinowychrusniakollpotatoepusiekwtfpanteraprakticahappykokeshiisnotcominghomepumpkinsoupfafnirscavetichgaarabusgeek4lifenibblershallowjarlaxlemonoxydKryptoniteVinroliredstripesJoschIsAGeekravenkasessita1stmachineteijakoolfinkreghsofiasheroine88matussnatexschlachtorosnitroventsilkdreamsmelicaaFroggyskillzmcflyGabyyMarieastrid-annePewPowself-destructivelittlegirlkoloryzacjaderdritteaerisihuntyoursoulcliffordfremdeofbitchesandbutterfliesRKflubbwtfkielto-nieistotnejanananenaklapkicongreveaffiaavgplhabcamaxoxo4TeenageDirtbagPencilPaperandRubberphartssignalpienicapicellastraycatMrrrukn0gMynameisClara919ReeshTHE6hdienidkapelsenSanthesophM3lk0rlordminxdnymartinsonniklashnevermorefuckitturionTrunusheadachedanielbohrernylkiTiffanyslexipapajaelentarie456sylwinaglamwoodynookfaulosophroundaboutamalBloodredswanmimi07denianskullyelundrilchytelkashitsuriPapsTrinkalauraarualkiki-birdballblindtextdarqueampileinmotherfocadrumkarolfascinatedwerandaahelloiloveyoucatchingadriPauletakarli2macounphilmacflyRayaunicornwantedv3bsoSarielp125lesatyrepowerToThePoepleowcanaziemna
8928 931c


'Mathematical aspirations' by Unearthed Comics

Reposted bythepunnerymeisterlukapertureMrWaspsymultanamolotovcupcakemoppieTechnofrikuswonkoniktwaznyihuntyoursoulpesymistapartyhardorgtfoKurkaWyluzujszmaypatrzpodnogiQdeucoffeebitchcocciuellakolektywzboczonescierwomozgmnieniebolimatuss

September 21 2014

0377 b6d0
Reposted byfadenbprocrastinatehardnaichTullfrogschlachtorosposiputtskillzmcflyjigglybrothor7onimbleSaintomidl3xh0p3liveattherainbow

September 08 2014


September 04 2014

1424 8d0d 500
Reposted bycraigaelost-in-spaceschaafsabvelqzKryptoniteteluschlachtorosg33kyToshioTVtuedelshadowfax42reloveutionkrybuselentariesuperbrainzskillzmcflyaperturemanticoreatrantaVinrolitichgadupidayJaanis93mrpafgruetzeteijakoolTokyoMEWShappymealmauakFredFuchsPewPowcygi-chanlhabcFreXxXckisbackCarrerelucidumintervallumBuchnekromantValarMorghulisnerdanelOsorkoniusvogelotsanafruitpolomilkchlodnawdowasiostraSenyianoctuaAnoviscotjedenLeMightyMustachemalinowychrusniakekeliasrandoomp0rnofrittatensupped6286foxgallaghercoloredgrayscaleune-raconteusebiruaffiapsyentistfrischhirnkissalonecomplexsucznikArecaSKobajashinaichMysticEnforcerbladzikfretkaWeksnordernoopsiakHerrWolfsofastnicapicellaiambabsijalokim0polaczettosereniteadremdicowaco6Tomred97khabarakhDieZudazzlingbiauekDTDSRanabeekortufkaWarxuarozdofripetrodzonymetafnordcoffeeandunicornsxmoshixschwarzematerieTullfroglolufoankinjkaneSlothSwimbogeek4lifebluevalentineonceagaintoadfrogSaper300ShikaShakaGei0ramaxoxo4lordminxmesoupdakosicksinhashNaitliszlubipunisherstragan-ze-snamipotatoeshitty-loveDataCrowzachlannycorrodequariondonotmindmelofiMagoryanPstrykDerOrwischerhanspeterwurstvolmkaynoaSmokehead18yfourthaddictionyoungandstupidBertIsTheWordshiaraenaGretelsofiasmakrossputniksweetheartpassingbirdlanderjotccemaslmaslmaslAtariCzeskakaszebwrite-url-hereSanthekapradinadarksideofthemoonjajeczkohalsharseelsmoke11ovtzaandzxa89Hypothermian-nudelsalatsadamuczasnazupeAmyLynnLeePachadidympnafiffeythesilenceofthealcoholickaheikraken-from-helleh-heethor7oTrunusanonimowahdiLukasYorkoscariolooqueinzynierbennytheastronautleniwabulajuhudorageniebitstackerniklashjapandepfannkuchenzombiekraskoambassadorofdumbdisappointmentkotficadatacopnomnomnomininafadenbgafzoraxoperativeAndiPorcelaindevloquejacoszeksonozakidesusignofthemothraZekokolokobercikbloodrainbowfallendebilmusztardaredwonderhappykokeshiperditumestgpkvtSpecies5618grarzynkathehedgehogsdilemmanomnomnomnomRRichienibblerpiszczelmetanoizeznuhTierraDelFuegov2pxwartemalarestonthrill-killerdieselmowerwerhamstern0gpieszczotykoniantihecpochearisolychnisMissySleepynem0ikaribananaapplequintasandzwiedzdul88MissDeWordeMrCoffedarkshamemastersvvatwonkoslovamodrzewszczepanmoopdeleindominikmcocciuellasowiazupaStagezoeniesrozalkadingensGauganfupduckmajowkaSchweinekloetenpsygatenutztrivrzekomyvsstormslarkinmagratcrimsonghostki-adilyricastAronphilmacflylefucheathahonigwurmjbeanMarshalrustyniklashsirfoxtravelling-without-movingtentatricewd40stopssqueakscucaTwinpanda3fusselchenasteroidchristinedamperfectlyimperfectkatrokreloveutionsiunkapanienkamorganitasilmeliveattherainbowuebermanntaem7vauteeBloodyBirchrinkaAnnettePortarerunvolldostardtejaDingodoodldreamboateldritchm303obscuregroupnamesmall-town-girlfungifretkasicksinTullfrogpapyrasiekxpwongabuh
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