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"Tell the chef, the beer is on me."
Aries: Nat Peterson
Taurus: Harold Bill Reginald
Virgo: Nancy Suzy Fish
Libra: Sadie Rechid
Aquarius: Old Man Jenkins
Pisces: Abigail Marge
THEY HAVE NAMES/????
Aries: my chemical romance
Taurus: my chemical romance
Gemini: my chemical romance
Cancer: my chemical romance
Leo: my chemical romance
Virgo: my chemical romance
Libra: my chemical romance
Scorpio: my chemical romance
Sagittarius: my chemical romance
Capricorn: my chemical romance
Aquarius: my chemical romance
Pisces: my chemical romance
aries: none. stay home.
taurus: the moon.
gemini: also the moon.
cancer: anything you goddamn want to.
leo: the sun.
virgo: the International Space Station.
libra: mars. good fucking luck.
scorpio: the sun, but you’ll probably lose.
sagittarius: a mylar balloon in the shape of a star.
capricorn: start kicking rocks. you’re bound to find a meteor some day, and when you do you’re gonna tear it a new asshole.
aquarius: the moon but only after tauros and gemini have softened it up a bit.
pisces: just go outside at night and scream.
Punk Rock: Aries, Taurus, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn, Aquarius
Pop Punk: Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Libra, Sagittarius, Pisces
*raeps this post worships this post* PUNK ROCK ALL THE WAY
though this might not be true with my friends’ signs and their music preferences
aries: a lil mean, but only bc they’re not going to pretend they like you at all. they like to have fun, may party occasionally or a lot but even then they like to chill out and read. even if it may seem like they don’t, they love people close to them deeply. wings their eyeliner perfectly
taurus: lazy food lovers with big hearts. closed-off emotionally unless you’re their close friend, but even then they won’t tell you 100% what’s wrong. they have great smiles and make you feel comfortable around them. they eat a lot of pasta.
gemini: so beautiful naturally. talkative (well, for most, def not all), is the person who you’ve never talked to but you just get this vibe from them that they’re great people and friends that makes you want to talk to them. very funny and cute, knows how to dress well. their voices sound like angels. i luv them
cancer: may be shy, but honestly i have never met a shy cancer. big cuddly babies and will make sure you know they like you everyday if they do. as friends, they’re perfect. they’ll make you laugh so hard and even though they may not be the coolest kid in school, the people who know them believe they are. good lovers and friends.
leo: they are the shit and know it. usually strikingly confident and good-looking. prideful. the most popular kids in school are usually leos. they are down to earth and sweet, but do not get on their bad side they will drop you like it was nothing. will make you laugh endlessly. they’re one of those people who you just met, but make you feel like close friends. easily approachable people.
virgo: weird. just weird as hell, which is why they’re often misunderstood. they’re extremely loyal to their friends, family and lovers. they aren’t judgemental at all, they just come off that way bc they’re shy/antisocial and are usually just observing you and everything you do (in a non-creepy way). positive people, appreciates art if they’re not an artist themselves.
libra: to me, they’re like gemini. very very friendly and nice people, it can be hard for them to be mean. they tend to be a bit gossipy but don’t gossip about anything too bad or mean. if they love you, they’ll write you letters or draw you pictures. down to earth and sympathizes easily. likes expensive clothing although they may not have much money at all.
scorpio: sexy af. have very pretty, intense eyes and good hair. mysterious and hard to get, they will leave you on the edge of your seat. despite this, they are shy and may come off as innocent, and they can be. once they fall in love, they fall deeply and intensely, bc they’re just very deep and intense people. has the best music taste.
sagittarius: they are the life of the party. they’re adventurous and free-spirited and make the best artists. they’re basically the hippie of the signs. may come off as bitchy but actually likes you, or vice versa. great, loyal friends with big hearts and will come into your life and make it 10x more fun. positive people to be around, they def will make you happier.
capricorn: hard-working balls of joy. so laid back and just goes with the flow. extremely sweet people. may not be popular, actually they are often outcasts, but they definitely shouldn’t be bc they’re some of the greatest people you’ll meet. no one has ever made me laugh as hard as a capricorn has! they are a bit sensitive, so take their feelings into consideration.
aquarius: even weirder than virgo, but that’s what makes them so fun. says random shit, knows how to make you laugh and are often very good-looking. may be a bit conceited, but that’s just bc they know how great they are. make the best writers. may be a bit clingy towards their friends and lovers, but they just have big hearts and hate it when people leave them.
pisces: my fav sign. they’re always so full of life and up for anything. they make any boring situation fun and are always there for you when you need them. they can be a bit pessimistic, so don’t take it to heart if it’s hard for you to cheer them up bc sometimes they just need alone time. huge hearted lovable people with the biggest and brightest smiles.
NOTE: this is coming from a virgo’s experience! you may think differently of the signs.
aries: masturbating using ram horns
taurus: bull riding
cancer: eating crustacean
leo: lion taming
virgo: picking flowers
scorpio: eating scorpions in shady vending areas
capricorn: herding goats
aquarius: pouring water or some shit
The well awaited sequel. cool astrology as a celebration for the original cow milking post getting 500 notes.
Aries: Tries to drink the milk with their eyebrows but fail once again and yell YOU WANNA FUCKING GO
Taurus: Drink gallons of milk with their cat
Gemini: "happy drinking"
Cancer: Doesn’t get any milk because they didn’t milk their damn cow
Leo: Claims that their milk is better quality because it came from a quality cow
Virgo: Drinks it just because they don’t want to offend the cow
Libra: Sits back and makes a profit by selling all the milk they got from the cow milking machines
Scorpio: Chugs it down so fast and so aggressively and so full of rage that half of it is just on their face, dripping
Sagittarius: Drink it and think to themselves, what a wonderful world
Capricorn: They would only drink it with their tea
Aquarius: Would drink it, but only if they are getting paid to
Pisces: Throws a milking party with the milk and everyone is invited
"Tell the chef, the beer is on me."
"Basically the price of a night on the town!"
"I'd love to help kickstart continued development! And 0 EUR/month really does make fiscal sense too... maybe I'll even get a shirt?" (there will be limited edition shirts for two and other goodies for each supporter as soon as we sold the 200)